Thursday, March 11, 2010

Sylar Short Stories: February 28, 19, 16

Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!

Me: (Walking along the sidewalk) WHERE ARE YOU?! (Sees a very long line of people leading up to something, decides to get into the line)

(15 minutes later...)

Me: (talking to myself) wait. What am I even in line for? Excuse me sir, but what are you in line for?

Guy: (thinks for a second) actually, I have absolutely no idea! I guess we’ll see!

Me: (rolls eyes, gets out of the long line and walks to the front) wow, this is such a long line! (Sees Jeslil, Lisa M, Ziggyeor, and other fan girls near the front of the line)

(At the front of the line is Sylar, sleeping upright on a bench while fan girls, one by one, cuddle next to him)

Me: WOOOOOW!

Jeslil: shhh! You’re going to wake him! (once StephJP finishes cuddling Sylar, Jeslil takes her turn)

Me: WOOOOW! That guy is going to have so much fun seeing what is at the front of the line.

Fangirls: SHHH!

Sylar: (wakes up) huh? (rubs his eyes, accidently jabs Jeslil)

Jeslil: Ouch!

Sylar: (stretching) I’m sorry...WAIT WHAT?! (quickly stands up) what’s happening? Why is there a line? A LINE OF FANGIRLS?! AHHH! (runs away)

(Fan girls start chasing him)

Me: And this is why you don’t sleep on a bench in the middle of the park. Especially if you’re Sylar.

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Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!

Sylar: WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?!

Me: Can I borrow you for a moment? (Grabs his arm, drags him to a dressing room in the mall) So my male model that I needed for Fashions class bailed at the last minute. Luckily he is the same size as you.

Sylar: So what? You want me to MODEL?

Me: (quickly) yes...BUT you just have to wear this jacket I made and walk down a runway in front of a crowd of people and pose.

Sylar: (sighs) ugh, the things I do for you. (Puts on my super awesome jacket)

Me: (Whispers) Don’t worry, you’ll do fine. Go! Go!

Sylar: (Breathes out, puts on a serious face, walks out onto the runway and does his strut)

Me: (Out in the audience now, watching him, smiles, gives him a thumbs up)

StephJP: OH MY GOSH! IT’S SYLAR!

(Steph, Persephone, Jeslil, and yada yada get up and start running towards Sylar)

Sylar: (Jumps off the stage, runs the other direction) AHHHHH!

Me: NO WAIT!! MY JACKET! SYLAR! GIVE IT BACK! (Follows the fans, they stop and look around wondering where Sylar went) where the heck did Sylar go? (Turns around, looks in a mall window, I tilt my head one way, then the other way) SYLAR?!

Sylar: (Gets out of his mannequin pose and runs out the store) I’ve always wanted to do that. Here (takes off jacket and gives it to me, gets back in the store window)

Me: (looking at him curiously) what are you doing?

Sylar: I’m hiding and scaring people at the same time. (I sit down on the bench facing the window)

Shopper: (comes out of the store, looks at the window and at Sylar, Sylar scares her) AHHHHH.

Me: -_-

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Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!

Me: (Makes a face) what are you doing?

Sylar: (A bit out of breath) I was trying to open a bag of chips without using my powers.

Me: (Starts to smile) really? Do you (giggles) need help?

Sylar: (Relieved look) YES! I’VE TRIED EVERYTHING! TRYING TO BE NORMAL IS SO HARD

Me: (Takes the bag, examines it for fun, see bite marks) wow, you really couldn’t open it!

Sylar: (crosses his arm, nods)

Me: (As a joke, I point my hand at it and I make some sounds to make it seem like I’m trying, the bag opens an inch at the tip) OH MY...

Sylar: (goes wide eyed) how did you do that?

Me: (quickly, stuttering) I...I...I...I...I...I don’t know! SYLAR! DID YOU HELP ME?

Sylar: NO! I haven’t used my power all day! (Paces back and forth, grabs another bag of chips) DO IT AGAIN!

Me: (points hand at the bag; thinks for it to open, the bag opens all the way) NO WAY...WHAT’S HAPPENING?

Sylar: (Smiling, excited) Do something else! See what you can also do with the pow...

Me: (Waiting for him to continue) Sylar? (He’s unresponsive, I wave my hand in front of his face, nothing happens) Hello!? OH NO. UNFREEZE! UNFREEZE!

Sylar: er!

Me: I JUST FROZE TIME! OH MY GAWD, THIS IS NOT HAPPENING.

Sylar: (giddy) Hehehehehe, do the Sylar thing on me!!! I’m going to be in pain, but it’ll probably be worth it.

Me: (I raise my arm and point at his forehead and move my arm, it makes a straight slit across his forehead, blood trickles down his head, he collapses) SYLAR?! SYLAR! (I check his pulse, no pulse) no...NOOOOO!

Me: (opens eyes, gets out of bed and looks at the time, it’s 9 in the morning) WOW. What a dream. AHHHHH!

Sylar: (On the right side of me) OW MY EARS!

Me: (hugs him) OH GOSH, YOU’RE ALIVE. I HAD THREE POWERS AND I USED ONE TO KILL YOU IN MY DREAM!

Sylar: (Starts laughing) why would you kill me?

Me: You asked me to.

Sylar: (Shrugs) reasonable excuse. (Climbs into my bed) Wow, your bed is so comfy

Me: -_-

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