Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Sylar Short Stories: March 21 , 19, 14

Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!

Sylar: WHAT?!

Me: Have you ever had an awkward moment?

Sylar: (goes into flashback mode)

Me: (Waits for him) Hello? Sylar? (Waves hand in front of his face)

Sylar: (Still in flashback mode)

Me: (Looks over to my right, I see a friend) OH HEY!

Friend: Hey! Who’s that strange man just staring off into the distance?

Me: Oh (Looks back at Sylar who is still in flashback mode) yeah, he is a friend of mine.

Friend: What is he doing?

Me: (Nonchalantly) I asked him if he ever had an awkward moment, and I think he just went into a flashback mode.

Friend: Tell him this then (whispers into my ear)

Me: (goes wide eyed) Are you sure? Okay then. Bye! (Walks up to Sylar, goes so up close to him, stares him down in his eyes and whispers) I love your fingernails so much, I would sell your nail clippings on Ebay.

Sylar: (Stands back, stares at me)

(10 seconds go by)

Me: HAPPY NATIONAL AWKWARD MOMENTS DAY!

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Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!

Sylar: (On the phone with me) HELLO?!

Me: (On the phone with him) hey! I want to try my new webcam, go on!

Sylar: (on the phone) UGGHH. FINE.

(6 minutes later)

Me: (Sees Sylar through the camera) HELLO! Hello! (Waves)

Sylar: You don’t have to ye... (stops talking, screen is totally still)

Me: (Looks at the screen) Hello? Sylar?! DARN IT! MY COMPUTER FROZE! OH MY GOSH! WHAT THE HECK! DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD! MY COMPUTER FROZE!

Sylar: (Breaks out into laughter) I can’t believe you fell for it.

Me: -_-. I’m going off for a while.
Sylar: (Continues laughing)

Me: (I log off, I start talking to myself) oh, I’m so getting him back.

(20 minutes later, I phone up Sylar to get back on the webcam)

Sylar: So I’m guessing you...(Breaks into laughter) fixed your computer!

Me: -_-. That’s the coolest painting ev...! (points to his wall, he looks, and I put a picture of what he sees when he talks to me and put it in front of the webcam at the perfect angle)

Sylar: (tilts his head to the right and the left) HAH! You can’t fool me with my own trick...(stares at the screen and waits for me to move) I’m just going to wait then.

(Meanwhile with the picture distracting him, I enter through his front door, he doesn’t notice)

Sylar: FRICCKKKKK! MY COMPUTER FROZE! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Bah...Humbug

Me: (In a sweet voice) what happened?

Sylar: (Doesn’t turn around) I was on the webcam with Nicole and it frooz...HEY WAIT A MINUTE! (Turns around and looks at me, quickly looks back at his computer. He does this 3 more times) WHAT!?

Me: MAHAH! I can’t believe you fell for that! Revenge is sweet.

Sylar: -_-

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Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!

Sylar: (Opens the door to his home) STOP BOTHERING ME WITH YOUR INFERNAL PESTERING!

Me: What? I just came by to give you a gift!

Sylar: (Curious) what is it?

Me: (Hands him the large box in my hands) here!

Sylar: (Sceptical) what’s this for?

Me: Don’t you know what day it is today?
Sylar: No...

Me: HONESTLY?! THE ONE PERSON I THOUGHT WOULD KNOW! JEEZ SYLAR! (storms out, hides behind a corner to see if I can hear Sylar)

Sylar: Huh? What did I do wrong? (Goes into his house)

Me: (Creep over to an open window where I can see and hear Sylar) come on, open it!

Sylar: (Opens the box) OH YAY! PIE! (Passes his calendar) what day is it today? March 14... (stares at this calendar)

Me: (still at his window, whispers to myself) come on Sylar, you can do this!

(2 minutes pass by)

Me: (Checking my phone, still waiting for Sylar to get it)

Sylar: (Still thinking, hasn’t eaten his pie) it’s no one’s birthday, and it’s definitely not mine...why did she give me pie? March...3...okay. the date is the 14th ... okay...

Me: Ugh...whatever (starts to leave)

Sylar: OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! (Laughs) It’s pi day today.

Me: (whispers to myself) yes, finally! (Looks up, Sylar’s head pops up out of the window)

Sylar: You whisper really loud.

Me: -_-

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