Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: NOW WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?!
Me: So I have two passes and I was wondering if you wanted to go...
Sylar: YES! I’LL GO WITH YOU!
Me: Are you sure? You didn’t even finish hearing what I said!
Sylar: Don’t care! Let’s go!
(20 minutes later)
Sylar: (confused) Where are we?
Me: We are at the set of Star Trek!
Sylar: (Jaw drops) what? Are you serious? Spock’s not going to be there right? Can I sit in the captains chair?
Me: I have no idea. I guess we’ll have to see...
(On the set, I thank the person who gives me the passes and Sylar wanders around, I catch up to him)
Sylar: (Talking to Uhura) so I was wondering if you would like to go grab a coffee sometime?
Uhura: I am currently in a relationship with Spock if you hadn’t heard already. (she walks away)
Me: Awe, poor you. (Looks behind him) OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH. LOOK! Spock and Kirk!
Sylar: (turns around) jeez...Spock! Spock! Spock! That’s all I hear these days. On billboards, in the Big Bang Theory...
(Spock sits in the captains chair)
Sylar: (To Spock) hey. That’s my seat.
Spock: No it isn’t. It doesn’t have your name on it.
Sylar: (Laughs) Yes it does!
Spock: (gets out of the chair) where?
(Sylar sits down and laughs at him)
Kirk: AHEM! Out of the chair!
Sylar: (He gets up and Spock laughs at him) -_-
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Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: (on the phone) I’m sorry. We can’t do this anymore
ME: Oh, you’re on the phone. I’ll just sit in the living room then.
Sylar: (Still on the phone) you mean so much to me, but it’s just not good for me!
Me: (Listens in to the conversation, getting a bit curious to whom he is talking to)
Sylar: (Voice is a little shaky) this relationship is hard to keep. Don’t you know that by now?
Me: (So curious now, whispers to myself) relationship too hard to keep?
Sylar: (In a serious tone) it’s not you, it’s me. I’m sorry...bye. (Hangs up)
Me: (Stands up) OH MY GOSH... YOU JUST BROKE UP WITH SOMEONE!
Sylar: (Dumbfounded) What?! NO! I was ending my subscription to Netflix!
Me: (Blinks a couple times) what? But everything you said that when you spoke to the Netflix person about cancelling your subscription was totally what someone who was breaking up with would say to the other.
Sylar: (Blinks) you just lost me. Don’t you think I would tell you if I were in a relationship with someone?
Me: (thinks) Nope.
Sylar: Exactly.
Me: -_-
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Sylar Short Stories: March 21 , 19, 14
Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: WHAT?!
Me: Have you ever had an awkward moment?
Sylar: (goes into flashback mode)
Me: (Waits for him) Hello? Sylar? (Waves hand in front of his face)
Sylar: (Still in flashback mode)
Me: (Looks over to my right, I see a friend) OH HEY!
Friend: Hey! Who’s that strange man just staring off into the distance?
Me: Oh (Looks back at Sylar who is still in flashback mode) yeah, he is a friend of mine.
Friend: What is he doing?
Me: (Nonchalantly) I asked him if he ever had an awkward moment, and I think he just went into a flashback mode.
Friend: Tell him this then (whispers into my ear)
Me: (goes wide eyed) Are you sure? Okay then. Bye! (Walks up to Sylar, goes so up close to him, stares him down in his eyes and whispers) I love your fingernails so much, I would sell your nail clippings on Ebay.
Sylar: (Stands back, stares at me)
(10 seconds go by)
Me: HAPPY NATIONAL AWKWARD MOMENTS DAY!
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Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: (On the phone with me) HELLO?!
Me: (On the phone with him) hey! I want to try my new webcam, go on!
Sylar: (on the phone) UGGHH. FINE.
(6 minutes later)
Me: (Sees Sylar through the camera) HELLO! Hello! (Waves)
Sylar: You don’t have to ye... (stops talking, screen is totally still)
Me: (Looks at the screen) Hello? Sylar?! DARN IT! MY COMPUTER FROZE! OH MY GOSH! WHAT THE HECK! DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD! MY COMPUTER FROZE!
Sylar: (Breaks out into laughter) I can’t believe you fell for it.
Me: -_-. I’m going off for a while.
Sylar: (Continues laughing)
Me: (I log off, I start talking to myself) oh, I’m so getting him back.
(20 minutes later, I phone up Sylar to get back on the webcam)
Sylar: So I’m guessing you...(Breaks into laughter) fixed your computer!
Me: -_-. That’s the coolest painting ev...! (points to his wall, he looks, and I put a picture of what he sees when he talks to me and put it in front of the webcam at the perfect angle)
Sylar: (tilts his head to the right and the left) HAH! You can’t fool me with my own trick...(stares at the screen and waits for me to move) I’m just going to wait then.
(Meanwhile with the picture distracting him, I enter through his front door, he doesn’t notice)
Sylar: FRICCKKKKK! MY COMPUTER FROZE! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Bah...Humbug
Me: (In a sweet voice) what happened?
Sylar: (Doesn’t turn around) I was on the webcam with Nicole and it frooz...HEY WAIT A MINUTE! (Turns around and looks at me, quickly looks back at his computer. He does this 3 more times) WHAT!?
Me: MAHAH! I can’t believe you fell for that! Revenge is sweet.
Sylar: -_-
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Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: (Opens the door to his home) STOP BOTHERING ME WITH YOUR INFERNAL PESTERING!
Me: What? I just came by to give you a gift!
Sylar: (Curious) what is it?
Me: (Hands him the large box in my hands) here!
Sylar: (Sceptical) what’s this for?
Me: Don’t you know what day it is today?
Sylar: No...
Me: HONESTLY?! THE ONE PERSON I THOUGHT WOULD KNOW! JEEZ SYLAR! (storms out, hides behind a corner to see if I can hear Sylar)
Sylar: Huh? What did I do wrong? (Goes into his house)
Me: (Creep over to an open window where I can see and hear Sylar) come on, open it!
Sylar: (Opens the box) OH YAY! PIE! (Passes his calendar) what day is it today? March 14... (stares at this calendar)
Me: (still at his window, whispers to myself) come on Sylar, you can do this!
(2 minutes pass by)
Me: (Checking my phone, still waiting for Sylar to get it)
Sylar: (Still thinking, hasn’t eaten his pie) it’s no one’s birthday, and it’s definitely not mine...why did she give me pie? March...3...okay. the date is the 14th ... okay...
Me: Ugh...whatever (starts to leave)
Sylar: OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! (Laughs) It’s pi day today.
Me: (whispers to myself) yes, finally! (Looks up, Sylar’s head pops up out of the window)
Sylar: You whisper really loud.
Me: -_-
Sylar: WHAT?!
Me: Have you ever had an awkward moment?
Sylar: (goes into flashback mode)
Me: (Waits for him) Hello? Sylar? (Waves hand in front of his face)
Sylar: (Still in flashback mode)
Me: (Looks over to my right, I see a friend) OH HEY!
Friend: Hey! Who’s that strange man just staring off into the distance?
Me: Oh (Looks back at Sylar who is still in flashback mode) yeah, he is a friend of mine.
Friend: What is he doing?
Me: (Nonchalantly) I asked him if he ever had an awkward moment, and I think he just went into a flashback mode.
Friend: Tell him this then (whispers into my ear)
Me: (goes wide eyed) Are you sure? Okay then. Bye! (Walks up to Sylar, goes so up close to him, stares him down in his eyes and whispers) I love your fingernails so much, I would sell your nail clippings on Ebay.
Sylar: (Stands back, stares at me)
(10 seconds go by)
Me: HAPPY NATIONAL AWKWARD MOMENTS DAY!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: (On the phone with me) HELLO?!
Me: (On the phone with him) hey! I want to try my new webcam, go on!
Sylar: (on the phone) UGGHH. FINE.
(6 minutes later)
Me: (Sees Sylar through the camera) HELLO! Hello! (Waves)
Sylar: You don’t have to ye... (stops talking, screen is totally still)
Me: (Looks at the screen) Hello? Sylar?! DARN IT! MY COMPUTER FROZE! OH MY GOSH! WHAT THE HECK! DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD! MY COMPUTER FROZE!
Sylar: (Breaks out into laughter) I can’t believe you fell for it.
Me: -_-. I’m going off for a while.
Sylar: (Continues laughing)
Me: (I log off, I start talking to myself) oh, I’m so getting him back.
(20 minutes later, I phone up Sylar to get back on the webcam)
Sylar: So I’m guessing you...(Breaks into laughter) fixed your computer!
Me: -_-. That’s the coolest painting ev...! (points to his wall, he looks, and I put a picture of what he sees when he talks to me and put it in front of the webcam at the perfect angle)
Sylar: (tilts his head to the right and the left) HAH! You can’t fool me with my own trick...(stares at the screen and waits for me to move) I’m just going to wait then.
(Meanwhile with the picture distracting him, I enter through his front door, he doesn’t notice)
Sylar: FRICCKKKKK! MY COMPUTER FROZE! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Bah...Humbug
Me: (In a sweet voice) what happened?
Sylar: (Doesn’t turn around) I was on the webcam with Nicole and it frooz...HEY WAIT A MINUTE! (Turns around and looks at me, quickly looks back at his computer. He does this 3 more times) WHAT!?
Me: MAHAH! I can’t believe you fell for that! Revenge is sweet.
Sylar: -_-
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Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: (Opens the door to his home) STOP BOTHERING ME WITH YOUR INFERNAL PESTERING!
Me: What? I just came by to give you a gift!
Sylar: (Curious) what is it?
Me: (Hands him the large box in my hands) here!
Sylar: (Sceptical) what’s this for?
Me: Don’t you know what day it is today?
Sylar: No...
Me: HONESTLY?! THE ONE PERSON I THOUGHT WOULD KNOW! JEEZ SYLAR! (storms out, hides behind a corner to see if I can hear Sylar)
Sylar: Huh? What did I do wrong? (Goes into his house)
Me: (Creep over to an open window where I can see and hear Sylar) come on, open it!
Sylar: (Opens the box) OH YAY! PIE! (Passes his calendar) what day is it today? March 14... (stares at this calendar)
Me: (still at his window, whispers to myself) come on Sylar, you can do this!
(2 minutes pass by)
Me: (Checking my phone, still waiting for Sylar to get it)
Sylar: (Still thinking, hasn’t eaten his pie) it’s no one’s birthday, and it’s definitely not mine...why did she give me pie? March...3...okay. the date is the 14th ... okay...
Me: Ugh...whatever (starts to leave)
Sylar: OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! (Laughs) It’s pi day today.
Me: (whispers to myself) yes, finally! (Looks up, Sylar’s head pops up out of the window)
Sylar: You whisper really loud.
Me: -_-
Sylar Short Stories (Super special edition): March 24, 25
Sylar Origin Story [Part 1]
Me: (Getting off work, I walk in the park, and I see a friend sitting on park bench) HEY! How are you?
Friend: (Brightens up) I’m awesome! I’M SO GLAD YOU’RE HERE! I need to tell you something! Sit down!
Me: (Sits down, looks at my friend) so what’s going on?
Friend: So you know how there is a pie eating contest?
Me: (Curious) Yes...(Looks behind her, sees a familiar person walking down the pathway, tilts my head left and right trying to remember who it is)
Friend: (notices this and looks behind) who’s that? He looks really really really familiar.
Me: (He walks past us and I continue to think, my eyes widen) oh...my...gosh...THAT’S SYLAR!
Friend: (leans into me.) Are you serious?
Me: YEAH! I’M POSITIVE! Those are his eyebrows! I’m going to say hi!
Friend: Are you CRAZY!? He’s a psychopathic serial killer! You don’t just say hi!
Me: I don’t care. (Gets up and starts walking towards him)
Friend: (just joking) so when he splits your forehead, can I have your vintage scarf?
Me: Hey Sylar! (He doesn’t turn around) SYLAR! (He still doesn’t turn around, he keeps walking) Fine... (Takes in a deep breath as I get closer to him) Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: WHAT?!
Me: Hi! (Runs off giggling)
Sylar: -_-
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sylar Origin Story [Part 2]
Sylar: (Finishes his coffee and goes outside, he thinks to himself) ‘Hmm...it looks nice outside, I’m going to go take a nice, peaceful walk’
Sylar: (Walks down the pathway in the park, looks around, he sees many couples, a lot of families, two teenage girls, a hotdog cart, and tourists.)
Person: That’s SYLAR!
Sylar: (Sighs, thinks to himself) ‘They always talk about me’ (Smiles, keeps walking)
Person: Hey Sylar!
Sylar: (Thinks to himself) ‘Oh no, not another fan girl, I think my peaceful walk just ended...should I fly out of here? No, it’ll cause too much of a scene’ (Keeps walking)
Person: SYLAR!
Sylar: (Walks a tiny bit faster)
Person: Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: (Turns around) WHAT?!
Person: (Her work ID showing, her name being Nicole) Hi! (She runs away giggling)
Sylar: -_- ... (Turns around and keeps walking, smiles) Hmm...Nicole. Interesting.
Me: (Getting off work, I walk in the park, and I see a friend sitting on park bench) HEY! How are you?
Friend: (Brightens up) I’m awesome! I’M SO GLAD YOU’RE HERE! I need to tell you something! Sit down!
Me: (Sits down, looks at my friend) so what’s going on?
Friend: So you know how there is a pie eating contest?
Me: (Curious) Yes...(Looks behind her, sees a familiar person walking down the pathway, tilts my head left and right trying to remember who it is)
Friend: (notices this and looks behind) who’s that? He looks really really really familiar.
Me: (He walks past us and I continue to think, my eyes widen) oh...my...gosh...THAT’S SYLAR!
Friend: (leans into me.) Are you serious?
Me: YEAH! I’M POSITIVE! Those are his eyebrows! I’m going to say hi!
Friend: Are you CRAZY!? He’s a psychopathic serial killer! You don’t just say hi!
Me: I don’t care. (Gets up and starts walking towards him)
Friend: (just joking) so when he splits your forehead, can I have your vintage scarf?
Me: Hey Sylar! (He doesn’t turn around) SYLAR! (He still doesn’t turn around, he keeps walking) Fine... (Takes in a deep breath as I get closer to him) Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: WHAT?!
Me: Hi! (Runs off giggling)
Sylar: -_-
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sylar Origin Story [Part 2]
Sylar: (Finishes his coffee and goes outside, he thinks to himself) ‘Hmm...it looks nice outside, I’m going to go take a nice, peaceful walk’
Sylar: (Walks down the pathway in the park, looks around, he sees many couples, a lot of families, two teenage girls, a hotdog cart, and tourists.)
Person: That’s SYLAR!
Sylar: (Sighs, thinks to himself) ‘They always talk about me’ (Smiles, keeps walking)
Person: Hey Sylar!
Sylar: (Thinks to himself) ‘Oh no, not another fan girl, I think my peaceful walk just ended...should I fly out of here? No, it’ll cause too much of a scene’ (Keeps walking)
Person: SYLAR!
Sylar: (Walks a tiny bit faster)
Person: Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: (Turns around) WHAT?!
Person: (Her work ID showing, her name being Nicole) Hi! (She runs away giggling)
Sylar: -_- ... (Turns around and keeps walking, smiles) Hmm...Nicole. Interesting.
Sylar Short Stories: March 11, 10, 8, 5
Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN FOR THE PAST WEEK?! I WAS ACTUALLY GETTING WORRIED.
Me: (Shocked) Worried? ABOUT ME?!
Sylar: uh YEAH! And why are you so tanned?
Me: (Begins) Well I went to...
Sylar: YOU GOT A SPRAY TAN! WOW IT’S SO NICE!
Me: NO! I went to...
Sylar: YOU USED A TANNING BED!
Me: NO! Those are bad for you. WHY WON’T YOU LET ME FINISH?!
Sylar: (Thinking...) if that’s not it...Let me think for a second.
(Leaves him to think about it, goes into a coffee house to grab something to drink)
Sylar: (Turns around) I KNOW WHERE YOU WENT! Hey! (Looks around for me) WHERE’D YOU GO?! Nicole? Hey! NICOLE! (Looks behind a tree)
Me: (Inside the coffee house) WOOOW... (Cashier looks at where I’m looking)
Cashier: What is he doing?
Me: I think he’s looking for me?
Cashier: Here are your drinks! Have a nice day!
Sylar: (Doesn’t notice me) NOO! I’VE LOST HER AGAIN! THE MADNESS!
Me: Dude. What are you doing?
Sylar: (Blinks) I...um...dropped my...um...KEYS!
Me: (Looks at him) here, I got you a drink. (Hands it to him) So have you figured it out yet?
Sylar: Figured out what?
Me: MY tan?
Sylar: (Absolutely and completely serious) WHOA! YOU GOT SO TANNED! HOW DID YOU TAN? Did you get a spray tan?
Me: -_-
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Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: (Intimidating voice and stare) you wanna play a game?
Me: (Wide eyes) okay...it depends what it is...
Sylar: (Walks up super close to me) staring contest.
Me: (backs away a bit) okay...
(for 10 seconds neither of us blink)
Sylar: There’s a spider on your arm!
Me: (Jumps and brushes off arms, blinking like mad) OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH GET IT OFF GET IT OFF.
Sylar: MAHAHA! I WIN!
Me: HEY! NO FAIR!
Sylar: Fine...one more time.
(15 seconds go by, neither of us blinking)
Me: (Eyes glance behind him, smiles)
Sylar: (not blinking) what?! Is there a spider? WELL I’M NOT GOINGTO FALL FOR IT.
Me: (not blinking) it’s not a spider. Someone is going to come up behind you and...
Sylar: NOPE! NOT FALLING FOR IT.
(Person comes up closer, I see that it’s Peter, he puts his finger to his mouth, I blink)
Sylar: HAH! I WIN! WOOP WOOOP! (Peter taps his shoulder, Sylar turns around)
Peter: (gives Sylar a pie to his face, runs away laughing) THAT’S WHAT YOU GET FOR RUINING MY ART PROJECT!
Me: Can’t say I didn’t warn you!
Sylar: (licking the whip cream around his mouth) -_-
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Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Me: WHERE ARE YOU!? (Sees him off to the distance with a bunch of adults and children) Uh oh... (Walks up to him)
Sylar: (singing) happy birthday dear Timmy! Happy Birthday to you! (Claps with the adults while the children cheer)
Me: (nudges him) what are you doing?!
Sylar: (Pulls me off to the side) I’m trying to score some free cake!
Me: (scoffs) really? Okay then. (Sits close to the table)
Parent: So who’s your kid? (hands Sylar a huge piece of cake)
Sylar: Oh, just little Randy over there. (Stuffs a big piece of cake in his mouth)
Parent: Randy? There’s no Randy at this party... HEY! WHO ARE YOU?!
Sylar: Did I say Randy? I meant Candy! No...Mandy! um...um...(Parents closing in on him)
Kid: (walking towards me with cake) hey! You want some cake?
Me: Sure (takes cake from him) Thanks!
Kid: No problem. My party was pretty boring until this crazy guy showed up looking for cake. This is just good entertainment!
Sylar: AHHHH!!! (runs away while the parents chase him)
Me: (eats cake and we both watch Sylar run away) you can say that again.
Sylar: (runs behind me and steals my cake) MAHAHAHA!
Me: -_-
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: MAHAHA! I’VE MASTERED THE ZORRO THING!
Me: (Looks at the tree, many Z’s marked into it and a couple S’s) nice! Let’s see!
Sylar: (Arm comes up and index finger points out, he makes the Z on the tree, grins)
Me: (confused. Cocks head to the side) did you hear that when you made that mark in the tree?
Sylar: (Looks at me) what noise?
Me: Make the Z again.
Sylar: (He does, and there is a high screeching sound) HUH! I’ve never noticed that!
Me: (cocks head to the other side) slice something else!
Sylar: (He does, the screeching sound is made again) WHERE IS THAT COMING FROM?! (He keeps slicing random things whilst people stare at him)
Me: OH MY GOSH! YOU HAVE YOUR OWN SOUND EFFECT!
Sylar: (Brightens up with a huge smile) that’s so true! I wonder if the “others” have a sound effect! (Calls up Hiro)
Hiro: YOU’RE RIGHT! I DO HAVE A SOUND EFFECT! (Teleports somewhere, we hear a sound effect, comes back) YATTA!
Me: (Pretends to be sad, sniffs) I want a sound effect. (Pout)
(Sylar and Hiro look at each other, shrugs, and Hiro continues teleporting back and forth and Sylar keeps slicing things, their sound effects keep going)
Me: -_- Wow.
Sylar: WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN FOR THE PAST WEEK?! I WAS ACTUALLY GETTING WORRIED.
Me: (Shocked) Worried? ABOUT ME?!
Sylar: uh YEAH! And why are you so tanned?
Me: (Begins) Well I went to...
Sylar: YOU GOT A SPRAY TAN! WOW IT’S SO NICE!
Me: NO! I went to...
Sylar: YOU USED A TANNING BED!
Me: NO! Those are bad for you. WHY WON’T YOU LET ME FINISH?!
Sylar: (Thinking...) if that’s not it...Let me think for a second.
(Leaves him to think about it, goes into a coffee house to grab something to drink)
Sylar: (Turns around) I KNOW WHERE YOU WENT! Hey! (Looks around for me) WHERE’D YOU GO?! Nicole? Hey! NICOLE! (Looks behind a tree)
Me: (Inside the coffee house) WOOOW... (Cashier looks at where I’m looking)
Cashier: What is he doing?
Me: I think he’s looking for me?
Cashier: Here are your drinks! Have a nice day!
Sylar: (Doesn’t notice me) NOO! I’VE LOST HER AGAIN! THE MADNESS!
Me: Dude. What are you doing?
Sylar: (Blinks) I...um...dropped my...um...KEYS!
Me: (Looks at him) here, I got you a drink. (Hands it to him) So have you figured it out yet?
Sylar: Figured out what?
Me: MY tan?
Sylar: (Absolutely and completely serious) WHOA! YOU GOT SO TANNED! HOW DID YOU TAN? Did you get a spray tan?
Me: -_-
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Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: (Intimidating voice and stare) you wanna play a game?
Me: (Wide eyes) okay...it depends what it is...
Sylar: (Walks up super close to me) staring contest.
Me: (backs away a bit) okay...
(for 10 seconds neither of us blink)
Sylar: There’s a spider on your arm!
Me: (Jumps and brushes off arms, blinking like mad) OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH GET IT OFF GET IT OFF.
Sylar: MAHAHA! I WIN!
Me: HEY! NO FAIR!
Sylar: Fine...one more time.
(15 seconds go by, neither of us blinking)
Me: (Eyes glance behind him, smiles)
Sylar: (not blinking) what?! Is there a spider? WELL I’M NOT GOINGTO FALL FOR IT.
Me: (not blinking) it’s not a spider. Someone is going to come up behind you and...
Sylar: NOPE! NOT FALLING FOR IT.
(Person comes up closer, I see that it’s Peter, he puts his finger to his mouth, I blink)
Sylar: HAH! I WIN! WOOP WOOOP! (Peter taps his shoulder, Sylar turns around)
Peter: (gives Sylar a pie to his face, runs away laughing) THAT’S WHAT YOU GET FOR RUINING MY ART PROJECT!
Me: Can’t say I didn’t warn you!
Sylar: (licking the whip cream around his mouth) -_-
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Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Me: WHERE ARE YOU!? (Sees him off to the distance with a bunch of adults and children) Uh oh... (Walks up to him)
Sylar: (singing) happy birthday dear Timmy! Happy Birthday to you! (Claps with the adults while the children cheer)
Me: (nudges him) what are you doing?!
Sylar: (Pulls me off to the side) I’m trying to score some free cake!
Me: (scoffs) really? Okay then. (Sits close to the table)
Parent: So who’s your kid? (hands Sylar a huge piece of cake)
Sylar: Oh, just little Randy over there. (Stuffs a big piece of cake in his mouth)
Parent: Randy? There’s no Randy at this party... HEY! WHO ARE YOU?!
Sylar: Did I say Randy? I meant Candy! No...Mandy! um...um...(Parents closing in on him)
Kid: (walking towards me with cake) hey! You want some cake?
Me: Sure (takes cake from him) Thanks!
Kid: No problem. My party was pretty boring until this crazy guy showed up looking for cake. This is just good entertainment!
Sylar: AHHHH!!! (runs away while the parents chase him)
Me: (eats cake and we both watch Sylar run away) you can say that again.
Sylar: (runs behind me and steals my cake) MAHAHAHA!
Me: -_-
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: MAHAHA! I’VE MASTERED THE ZORRO THING!
Me: (Looks at the tree, many Z’s marked into it and a couple S’s) nice! Let’s see!
Sylar: (Arm comes up and index finger points out, he makes the Z on the tree, grins)
Me: (confused. Cocks head to the side) did you hear that when you made that mark in the tree?
Sylar: (Looks at me) what noise?
Me: Make the Z again.
Sylar: (He does, and there is a high screeching sound) HUH! I’ve never noticed that!
Me: (cocks head to the other side) slice something else!
Sylar: (He does, the screeching sound is made again) WHERE IS THAT COMING FROM?! (He keeps slicing random things whilst people stare at him)
Me: OH MY GOSH! YOU HAVE YOUR OWN SOUND EFFECT!
Sylar: (Brightens up with a huge smile) that’s so true! I wonder if the “others” have a sound effect! (Calls up Hiro)
Hiro: YOU’RE RIGHT! I DO HAVE A SOUND EFFECT! (Teleports somewhere, we hear a sound effect, comes back) YATTA!
Me: (Pretends to be sad, sniffs) I want a sound effect. (Pout)
(Sylar and Hiro look at each other, shrugs, and Hiro continues teleporting back and forth and Sylar keeps slicing things, their sound effects keep going)
Me: -_- Wow.
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Sylar Short Stories: February 28, 19, 16
Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Me: (Walking along the sidewalk) WHERE ARE YOU?! (Sees a very long line of people leading up to something, decides to get into the line)
(15 minutes later...)
Me: (talking to myself) wait. What am I even in line for? Excuse me sir, but what are you in line for?
Guy: (thinks for a second) actually, I have absolutely no idea! I guess we’ll see!
Me: (rolls eyes, gets out of the long line and walks to the front) wow, this is such a long line! (Sees Jeslil, Lisa M, Ziggyeor, and other fan girls near the front of the line)
(At the front of the line is Sylar, sleeping upright on a bench while fan girls, one by one, cuddle next to him)
Me: WOOOOOW!
Jeslil: shhh! You’re going to wake him! (once StephJP finishes cuddling Sylar, Jeslil takes her turn)
Me: WOOOOW! That guy is going to have so much fun seeing what is at the front of the line.
Fangirls: SHHH!
Sylar: (wakes up) huh? (rubs his eyes, accidently jabs Jeslil)
Jeslil: Ouch!
Sylar: (stretching) I’m sorry...WAIT WHAT?! (quickly stands up) what’s happening? Why is there a line? A LINE OF FANGIRLS?! AHHH! (runs away)
(Fan girls start chasing him)
Me: And this is why you don’t sleep on a bench in the middle of the park. Especially if you’re Sylar.
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Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?!
Me: Can I borrow you for a moment? (Grabs his arm, drags him to a dressing room in the mall) So my male model that I needed for Fashions class bailed at the last minute. Luckily he is the same size as you.
Sylar: So what? You want me to MODEL?
Me: (quickly) yes...BUT you just have to wear this jacket I made and walk down a runway in front of a crowd of people and pose.
Sylar: (sighs) ugh, the things I do for you. (Puts on my super awesome jacket)
Me: (Whispers) Don’t worry, you’ll do fine. Go! Go!
Sylar: (Breathes out, puts on a serious face, walks out onto the runway and does his strut)
Me: (Out in the audience now, watching him, smiles, gives him a thumbs up)
StephJP: OH MY GOSH! IT’S SYLAR!
(Steph, Persephone, Jeslil, and yada yada get up and start running towards Sylar)
Sylar: (Jumps off the stage, runs the other direction) AHHHHH!
Me: NO WAIT!! MY JACKET! SYLAR! GIVE IT BACK! (Follows the fans, they stop and look around wondering where Sylar went) where the heck did Sylar go? (Turns around, looks in a mall window, I tilt my head one way, then the other way) SYLAR?!
Sylar: (Gets out of his mannequin pose and runs out the store) I’ve always wanted to do that. Here (takes off jacket and gives it to me, gets back in the store window)
Me: (looking at him curiously) what are you doing?
Sylar: I’m hiding and scaring people at the same time. (I sit down on the bench facing the window)
Shopper: (comes out of the store, looks at the window and at Sylar, Sylar scares her) AHHHHH.
Me: -_-
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Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Me: (Makes a face) what are you doing?
Sylar: (A bit out of breath) I was trying to open a bag of chips without using my powers.
Me: (Starts to smile) really? Do you (giggles) need help?
Sylar: (Relieved look) YES! I’VE TRIED EVERYTHING! TRYING TO BE NORMAL IS SO HARD
Me: (Takes the bag, examines it for fun, see bite marks) wow, you really couldn’t open it!
Sylar: (crosses his arm, nods)
Me: (As a joke, I point my hand at it and I make some sounds to make it seem like I’m trying, the bag opens an inch at the tip) OH MY...
Sylar: (goes wide eyed) how did you do that?
Me: (quickly, stuttering) I...I...I...I...I...I don’t know! SYLAR! DID YOU HELP ME?
Sylar: NO! I haven’t used my power all day! (Paces back and forth, grabs another bag of chips) DO IT AGAIN!
Me: (points hand at the bag; thinks for it to open, the bag opens all the way) NO WAY...WHAT’S HAPPENING?
Sylar: (Smiling, excited) Do something else! See what you can also do with the pow...
Me: (Waiting for him to continue) Sylar? (He’s unresponsive, I wave my hand in front of his face, nothing happens) Hello!? OH NO. UNFREEZE! UNFREEZE!
Sylar: er!
Me: I JUST FROZE TIME! OH MY GAWD, THIS IS NOT HAPPENING.
Sylar: (giddy) Hehehehehe, do the Sylar thing on me!!! I’m going to be in pain, but it’ll probably be worth it.
Me: (I raise my arm and point at his forehead and move my arm, it makes a straight slit across his forehead, blood trickles down his head, he collapses) SYLAR?! SYLAR! (I check his pulse, no pulse) no...NOOOOO!
Me: (opens eyes, gets out of bed and looks at the time, it’s 9 in the morning) WOW. What a dream. AHHHHH!
Sylar: (On the right side of me) OW MY EARS!
Me: (hugs him) OH GOSH, YOU’RE ALIVE. I HAD THREE POWERS AND I USED ONE TO KILL YOU IN MY DREAM!
Sylar: (Starts laughing) why would you kill me?
Me: You asked me to.
Sylar: (Shrugs) reasonable excuse. (Climbs into my bed) Wow, your bed is so comfy
Me: -_-
Me: (Walking along the sidewalk) WHERE ARE YOU?! (Sees a very long line of people leading up to something, decides to get into the line)
(15 minutes later...)
Me: (talking to myself) wait. What am I even in line for? Excuse me sir, but what are you in line for?
Guy: (thinks for a second) actually, I have absolutely no idea! I guess we’ll see!
Me: (rolls eyes, gets out of the long line and walks to the front) wow, this is such a long line! (Sees Jeslil, Lisa M, Ziggyeor, and other fan girls near the front of the line)
(At the front of the line is Sylar, sleeping upright on a bench while fan girls, one by one, cuddle next to him)
Me: WOOOOOW!
Jeslil: shhh! You’re going to wake him! (once StephJP finishes cuddling Sylar, Jeslil takes her turn)
Me: WOOOOW! That guy is going to have so much fun seeing what is at the front of the line.
Fangirls: SHHH!
Sylar: (wakes up) huh? (rubs his eyes, accidently jabs Jeslil)
Jeslil: Ouch!
Sylar: (stretching) I’m sorry...WAIT WHAT?! (quickly stands up) what’s happening? Why is there a line? A LINE OF FANGIRLS?! AHHH! (runs away)
(Fan girls start chasing him)
Me: And this is why you don’t sleep on a bench in the middle of the park. Especially if you’re Sylar.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?!
Me: Can I borrow you for a moment? (Grabs his arm, drags him to a dressing room in the mall) So my male model that I needed for Fashions class bailed at the last minute. Luckily he is the same size as you.
Sylar: So what? You want me to MODEL?
Me: (quickly) yes...BUT you just have to wear this jacket I made and walk down a runway in front of a crowd of people and pose.
Sylar: (sighs) ugh, the things I do for you. (Puts on my super awesome jacket)
Me: (Whispers) Don’t worry, you’ll do fine. Go! Go!
Sylar: (Breathes out, puts on a serious face, walks out onto the runway and does his strut)
Me: (Out in the audience now, watching him, smiles, gives him a thumbs up)
StephJP: OH MY GOSH! IT’S SYLAR!
(Steph, Persephone, Jeslil, and yada yada get up and start running towards Sylar)
Sylar: (Jumps off the stage, runs the other direction) AHHHHH!
Me: NO WAIT!! MY JACKET! SYLAR! GIVE IT BACK! (Follows the fans, they stop and look around wondering where Sylar went) where the heck did Sylar go? (Turns around, looks in a mall window, I tilt my head one way, then the other way) SYLAR?!
Sylar: (Gets out of his mannequin pose and runs out the store) I’ve always wanted to do that. Here (takes off jacket and gives it to me, gets back in the store window)
Me: (looking at him curiously) what are you doing?
Sylar: I’m hiding and scaring people at the same time. (I sit down on the bench facing the window)
Shopper: (comes out of the store, looks at the window and at Sylar, Sylar scares her) AHHHHH.
Me: -_-
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Me: (Makes a face) what are you doing?
Sylar: (A bit out of breath) I was trying to open a bag of chips without using my powers.
Me: (Starts to smile) really? Do you (giggles) need help?
Sylar: (Relieved look) YES! I’VE TRIED EVERYTHING! TRYING TO BE NORMAL IS SO HARD
Me: (Takes the bag, examines it for fun, see bite marks) wow, you really couldn’t open it!
Sylar: (crosses his arm, nods)
Me: (As a joke, I point my hand at it and I make some sounds to make it seem like I’m trying, the bag opens an inch at the tip) OH MY...
Sylar: (goes wide eyed) how did you do that?
Me: (quickly, stuttering) I...I...I...I...I...I don’t know! SYLAR! DID YOU HELP ME?
Sylar: NO! I haven’t used my power all day! (Paces back and forth, grabs another bag of chips) DO IT AGAIN!
Me: (points hand at the bag; thinks for it to open, the bag opens all the way) NO WAY...WHAT’S HAPPENING?
Sylar: (Smiling, excited) Do something else! See what you can also do with the pow...
Me: (Waiting for him to continue) Sylar? (He’s unresponsive, I wave my hand in front of his face, nothing happens) Hello!? OH NO. UNFREEZE! UNFREEZE!
Sylar: er!
Me: I JUST FROZE TIME! OH MY GAWD, THIS IS NOT HAPPENING.
Sylar: (giddy) Hehehehehe, do the Sylar thing on me!!! I’m going to be in pain, but it’ll probably be worth it.
Me: (I raise my arm and point at his forehead and move my arm, it makes a straight slit across his forehead, blood trickles down his head, he collapses) SYLAR?! SYLAR! (I check his pulse, no pulse) no...NOOOOO!
Me: (opens eyes, gets out of bed and looks at the time, it’s 9 in the morning) WOW. What a dream. AHHHHH!
Sylar: (On the right side of me) OW MY EARS!
Me: (hugs him) OH GOSH, YOU’RE ALIVE. I HAD THREE POWERS AND I USED ONE TO KILL YOU IN MY DREAM!
Sylar: (Starts laughing) why would you kill me?
Me: You asked me to.
Sylar: (Shrugs) reasonable excuse. (Climbs into my bed) Wow, your bed is so comfy
Me: -_-
Sylar Short Stories: February 15-14, 10, 4
Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: And just like that, my eyebrow hairs are tamed.
Me: Dude, what are you doing?
Director: CUT!
Sylar: I’M IN THE MIDDLE OF FILMING A COMMERCIAL!
Me: For (looks at the thing that Sylar is holding) EYEBROW TAMER?! (Laughs)
Sylar: Stand to the side (Stares at me, then at the camera) With this, I am able to do many of the common activities I do without having to worry about my eyebrows!
Me: (Steps in front of the camera, super enthusiastic) like sawing off people’s heads and taking their power!
Director: CUT! (whispers to the crew) Where’s the makeup crew! We need to cover some of the shine on Sylar’s forehead!
Sylar: STOP MESSING THIS UP FOR ME!
Me: What?! It’s funny! (Takes the product, opens it, puts some on my hands and smells it) ugh, this stinks.
Sylar: So quit touching it! (Makeup people come to powder his forehead)
Me: (Putting some of the cream on Sylar’s eyebrows, combs it using the eyebrow comb, and I face the camera) even serial killers like Sylar need his eyebrows tamed! What would he do without it?!
Sylar: (Smiles) Yeah, very funny Nicole.
Director: AND CUT! THAT’S A WRAP!
Sylar and I: What?
Director: That was perfect!
Sylar: No way! THAT IS NOT GOING TO BE USED ON NATIONAL TELEVISION!
(Later that week, in Sylar’s house)
Me: TURN ON THE TV!
Sylar: (turns on the TV, the commercial is on) oh...my...gosh.
Me: (stands in front of him) Hey, at least your eyebrows look AWESOME!
Sylar: -_-
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: (Nowhere to be seen) ARGH CAN YOU HELP ME?!
Me: (Looking around) WHERE ARE YOU?!
Sylar: (Hand pops out from a pile of chocolates and flowers) HERE!
Me: (Trying to find his hand under the massive pile, finds it and pulls him out) are you okay?
Sylar: (Brushes off his pants, picks out a flower out of his hair) my head is buzzing and I smell like roses and chocolates, but otherwise I’m fine.
Me: (Still looking at the massive pile) how did you get under there?
Sylar: I have no idea! I just took a couple steps out of my house, and next thing I know, it’s dark and it smells like chocolate! I really dislike Valentine’s Day.
Me: OH! IT’S ST. VALENTINE’S DAY TODAY?!
Sylar: Um...yeah! How else do you explain the chocolates and flowers? (Runs hands through his hair, pulls out another flower)
Me: Well I thought you usually get flowers and chocolate!
Sylar: Yes, and now I’M SICK AND TIRED OF IT! If I get another box of chocolates or flowers for Valentine’s, I’m literally going to kill that person. I’d be pretty mad if you got me flowers or chocolate!
Me: (Shocked at his response) actually...I got you...um... (looks through wallet, hoping to find something for him, I find a coupon for pie that I wanted to use) THIS! (hands him the coupon)
Sylar: YAY! SOMETHING USEFUL! Thanks! (Gives me a kiss on the cheek) Happy St. Valentine’s Day!
Me: (my heart melts as I giggle like an idiot)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Me: WHERE ARE YOU?! (Goes outside, looks into the sky, squints eyes, sees someone flying in a Superman costume)
1st stranger: What’s that?
2nd stranger: Is it a bird?
1st stranger: Is it a plane?
2nd stranger: NO! IT’S SUPER... WAIT. No it isn’t! IT’S...
Me: SYLAR!
1st and 2nd stranger: AHHHH! (Start running) Girl you better run!
Me: (Looks at them, calmly) no, I’m fine.
1st stranger: AHHHHHHHHHH (runs into a tree, goes unconscious)
Me: (Grimaces) ouch. HEY SYLAR! DO THE POSE!
Sylar: (Flying in the air, does the famous Superman pose) I’m coming down! (Lands perfectly) What do you think?
Me: (examining his costume and blurts out) spandex is lovely on you. (Goes red after hearing what I said.)
Sylar: I know right? The fan girls would just love to see this! (puts on a button on shirt)
Me: (goes wide eyed) You shouldn’t have said that. LOOK! (points off to the distance)
(Sarahi, Tiff, Jeslil, and Ziggyeor come running)
Sylar: AHH! GOTTA GO! (Rips off shirt, flies off, comes back down) HAH! DID YOU SEE THAT CLASSIC SUPERMAN MOVE? (Flies back into the air)
Me: -_-
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: (Yawns, opens the fridge door and gets out his milk, clutches something red in his other hand) AHH! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!
Me: (sighs) don’t you remember? We were supposed to see a play at 2. It’s 3 in the afternoon right now.
Sylar: Oh...right...well you know, you could have...
Me: (eyes turn towards his hand holding the red thing) what’s that?
Sylar: (Follows my gaze, hides it behind his back) nothing...
Me: (eyes go wide) OH MY GOSH THERE IS A SPIDER ON YOUR PJS!
Sylar: AHHHH! (He drops the red thing)
Me: (Quickly pick it up) MA HAH! NINJA! (Looks at the red thing, it’s an Uhura doll) You like Uhura?
Sylar: (Grabs it from my hand) NO! OF COURSE NOT! (Looks down, rocks on his heels) Maybe...
Me: Aww! That’s so cute! Sylar, you are just so darn cute!
Sylar: (blushes) hehe. (Clears his throat, grabs the Uhura plush, bring her up to his room, and comes back down, and in a gruff voice) I’m going to go do some manly things now.
Me: -_-
Sylar: And just like that, my eyebrow hairs are tamed.
Me: Dude, what are you doing?
Director: CUT!
Sylar: I’M IN THE MIDDLE OF FILMING A COMMERCIAL!
Me: For (looks at the thing that Sylar is holding) EYEBROW TAMER?! (Laughs)
Sylar: Stand to the side (Stares at me, then at the camera) With this, I am able to do many of the common activities I do without having to worry about my eyebrows!
Me: (Steps in front of the camera, super enthusiastic) like sawing off people’s heads and taking their power!
Director: CUT! (whispers to the crew) Where’s the makeup crew! We need to cover some of the shine on Sylar’s forehead!
Sylar: STOP MESSING THIS UP FOR ME!
Me: What?! It’s funny! (Takes the product, opens it, puts some on my hands and smells it) ugh, this stinks.
Sylar: So quit touching it! (Makeup people come to powder his forehead)
Me: (Putting some of the cream on Sylar’s eyebrows, combs it using the eyebrow comb, and I face the camera) even serial killers like Sylar need his eyebrows tamed! What would he do without it?!
Sylar: (Smiles) Yeah, very funny Nicole.
Director: AND CUT! THAT’S A WRAP!
Sylar and I: What?
Director: That was perfect!
Sylar: No way! THAT IS NOT GOING TO BE USED ON NATIONAL TELEVISION!
(Later that week, in Sylar’s house)
Me: TURN ON THE TV!
Sylar: (turns on the TV, the commercial is on) oh...my...gosh.
Me: (stands in front of him) Hey, at least your eyebrows look AWESOME!
Sylar: -_-
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Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: (Nowhere to be seen) ARGH CAN YOU HELP ME?!
Me: (Looking around) WHERE ARE YOU?!
Sylar: (Hand pops out from a pile of chocolates and flowers) HERE!
Me: (Trying to find his hand under the massive pile, finds it and pulls him out) are you okay?
Sylar: (Brushes off his pants, picks out a flower out of his hair) my head is buzzing and I smell like roses and chocolates, but otherwise I’m fine.
Me: (Still looking at the massive pile) how did you get under there?
Sylar: I have no idea! I just took a couple steps out of my house, and next thing I know, it’s dark and it smells like chocolate! I really dislike Valentine’s Day.
Me: OH! IT’S ST. VALENTINE’S DAY TODAY?!
Sylar: Um...yeah! How else do you explain the chocolates and flowers? (Runs hands through his hair, pulls out another flower)
Me: Well I thought you usually get flowers and chocolate!
Sylar: Yes, and now I’M SICK AND TIRED OF IT! If I get another box of chocolates or flowers for Valentine’s, I’m literally going to kill that person. I’d be pretty mad if you got me flowers or chocolate!
Me: (Shocked at his response) actually...I got you...um... (looks through wallet, hoping to find something for him, I find a coupon for pie that I wanted to use) THIS! (hands him the coupon)
Sylar: YAY! SOMETHING USEFUL! Thanks! (Gives me a kiss on the cheek) Happy St. Valentine’s Day!
Me: (my heart melts as I giggle like an idiot)
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Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Me: WHERE ARE YOU?! (Goes outside, looks into the sky, squints eyes, sees someone flying in a Superman costume)
1st stranger: What’s that?
2nd stranger: Is it a bird?
1st stranger: Is it a plane?
2nd stranger: NO! IT’S SUPER... WAIT. No it isn’t! IT’S...
Me: SYLAR!
1st and 2nd stranger: AHHHH! (Start running) Girl you better run!
Me: (Looks at them, calmly) no, I’m fine.
1st stranger: AHHHHHHHHHH (runs into a tree, goes unconscious)
Me: (Grimaces) ouch. HEY SYLAR! DO THE POSE!
Sylar: (Flying in the air, does the famous Superman pose) I’m coming down! (Lands perfectly) What do you think?
Me: (examining his costume and blurts out) spandex is lovely on you. (Goes red after hearing what I said.)
Sylar: I know right? The fan girls would just love to see this! (puts on a button on shirt)
Me: (goes wide eyed) You shouldn’t have said that. LOOK! (points off to the distance)
(Sarahi, Tiff, Jeslil, and Ziggyeor come running)
Sylar: AHH! GOTTA GO! (Rips off shirt, flies off, comes back down) HAH! DID YOU SEE THAT CLASSIC SUPERMAN MOVE? (Flies back into the air)
Me: -_-
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Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: (Yawns, opens the fridge door and gets out his milk, clutches something red in his other hand) AHH! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!
Me: (sighs) don’t you remember? We were supposed to see a play at 2. It’s 3 in the afternoon right now.
Sylar: Oh...right...well you know, you could have...
Me: (eyes turn towards his hand holding the red thing) what’s that?
Sylar: (Follows my gaze, hides it behind his back) nothing...
Me: (eyes go wide) OH MY GOSH THERE IS A SPIDER ON YOUR PJS!
Sylar: AHHHH! (He drops the red thing)
Me: (Quickly pick it up) MA HAH! NINJA! (Looks at the red thing, it’s an Uhura doll) You like Uhura?
Sylar: (Grabs it from my hand) NO! OF COURSE NOT! (Looks down, rocks on his heels) Maybe...
Me: Aww! That’s so cute! Sylar, you are just so darn cute!
Sylar: (blushes) hehe. (Clears his throat, grabs the Uhura plush, bring her up to his room, and comes back down, and in a gruff voice) I’m going to go do some manly things now.
Me: -_-
Sylar Short Stories: February 3-2, January 30, 28, 2010
Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: YEAH?! WHAT?! (Trips and falls down the stairs, knocks his head pretty hard)
Me: OH MY GOSH! (Runs to his side, holds his head up) ARE YOU OKAY?
Sylar: (Sits upright, rubs his head) where am I? What happened?
Me: You’re in the park. You just tripped and fell down those stairs.
Sylar: Oh. Another question...Who are you?
Me: I’m your friend... (Worried) Nicole.
Sylar: Oh, okay. Um. Who am I?
Me: (Shocked, goes wide eyed) You don’t know who you are? Your name is Gabriel Gray! SYLAR!
Sylar: So my name is Sylar? And you’re my girlfriend?
Me: (Blushes, giggles) I’m not your girlfriend and yes, your name is Sylar.
Sylar: But you are a girl and you are my friend so therefore, a girlfriend?
Me: Sure (giggles) let’s go and try to get your memory back
Sylar: Okay. (gets up)
(We walk by a guy selling pumpkin pie; Sylar has no reaction towards this)
Me: Wait! What did we just pass by?
Sylar: A pumpkin pie stand?
Me: (Dumbfounded) let’s keep going...
(We walk by a ton of fan girls, he does not run or fly away, and I continue my disbelief)
Me: Okay, this is seriously freaking me... (I trip on a tree branch and this makes me fall on Sylar, who also falls)
Sylar: (hits his head again) Ouch, my head hurts. Nicole, why are you on top of me?
Me: (Blushed, gets up) I’m sorry, I tripped and fell on you...WAIT. Did you just say my name?
Sylar: Yes...what’s the matter?
Me: WHAT’S YOUR NAME?
Sylar: Sylar...did I have amnesia or some... (sniffs the air) I SMELL PIE.
Me: -_-
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Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: (opens his front door) WHAT?!
Me: I’M SO BORED. Entertain me.
Sylar: Oh. Um, I was just going to the grocery store. Um, you want to come with me?
Me: Sure, it might entertain me. (trudging to his car because of my boredom)
(10 minutes later, we arrive at the grocery store. We enter the grocery store, we get many looks of fear)
Sylar: (Getting a basket, woman is in the way) Excuse me.
Woman: AHHHHH! (Runs and drops everything she was holding)
(We walk through the store, grabbing something in every aisle, still getting horrified stares and screams)
Man: HEY YOU! YOU HAVE NO RIGHT COMING IN HERE AND SCARING EVERYONE.
Sylar: (turns around) Excuse me? (Looks him dead straight in the eye)
Man: (goes wide eyed) UM NEVER MIND. (Turns around, screams and runs out the door)
Sylar: Let’s go pay!
(We walk up to a super long line)
Me: Sylar? Why this line?
Woman 2: (Looks at Sylar, goes wide eyed, she moves out of the line, the rest of the line follows until we’re next to pay)
Cashier: (Gulps, starts sweating) hel...hello. Did you find...find...everything you were...were looking for?
Sylar: (looks at him with the evil stare) No. Your prices are a bit too high
Cashier: (to the point of fainting) then...then...it’s (squeaks) free. (faints)
Sylar: (Takes his groceries) come on Nicole! (Grinning from ear to ear)
Me: (Looking for his car) wow, is it always like that when you buy groceries?
Sylar: Actually, no! I actually have no idea why they were that scared. Usually, I get a lot of staring. I NEVER get screams or free stuff.
Me: (looks at his face, goes wide eyed) uh...uh...THERE’S A SPIDER ON YOUR FACE! (points)
Sylar: (goes wide eyed) AHHHHHHHHHH!
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Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: WHAT!?
Spock: You need not yell. I must discuss something of rather importance with you.
Sylar: DUDE! I’M NOT TALKING WITH YOU. I DON’T LIKE YOU.
Spock: Take a number. But of course, what I must speak to you are about your misdemeanours against innocent victims.
Sylar: HAH! WHY DON’T YOU TAKE A NUMBER! You aren’t the first to try to change me!
Me: Hey guys! What’s going on?
Sylar: Mister Spock is trying to prevent me from killing people for their power.
Me: (looks at Spock) Really? Trust me, you aren’t the first to try to change him.
Spock: Why is everyone under the impression that this is a tough task to accomplish? Surely someone can change him.
Me: Nope! Sorry! You’d make the logical choice of not trying to change him.
Spock: Very well. (walks back to James T. Kirk)
Kirk: HAH! I TOLD YOU SO!
Spock: -_-
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Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: WHAT?! I’M ACTUALLY NOT BUSY SO YOU HAVE MY COMPLETE ATTENTION!
Me: I have a question that has been bothering me for quite a while actually.
Sylar: (goes wide eyed) it’s not one of those “do you like me” kind of questions is it?
Me: NO! Of course not! I was just wondering why you haven’t killed me or ran away from me since I’m like one of your biggest fans!
Sylar: (relieved) OH! It’s because unlike the fan girls...
Raine: AHHH! SYLAR! LET’S GET HIM GIRLS!
Me: (Sits waiting while Sylar gets chased by Raine, Jeslil, Atefeh, Tiff, and StephJP)
Sylar: (Comes back with his shirt missing and his hair messed up) you aren’t as ... fanatical as they are. And because you understand my need for ... (sniffs the air, gets up)
Me: (Sits waiting as Sylar gets lured in by the fan girls again)
Sylar: (comes back half naked with a plate of pumpkin pie) pie! Those are the reasons.
Me: I’m sorry, WHAT?! THAT’S WHY WE’RE FRIENDS?! BECAUSE I’M NOT FANATICAL AND I UNDERSTAND YOUR NEED FOR PIE?!
Sylar: (Looks shocked) umm...
Me: Yup, that seems right.
Sylar: -_-
Sylar: YEAH?! WHAT?! (Trips and falls down the stairs, knocks his head pretty hard)
Me: OH MY GOSH! (Runs to his side, holds his head up) ARE YOU OKAY?
Sylar: (Sits upright, rubs his head) where am I? What happened?
Me: You’re in the park. You just tripped and fell down those stairs.
Sylar: Oh. Another question...Who are you?
Me: I’m your friend... (Worried) Nicole.
Sylar: Oh, okay. Um. Who am I?
Me: (Shocked, goes wide eyed) You don’t know who you are? Your name is Gabriel Gray! SYLAR!
Sylar: So my name is Sylar? And you’re my girlfriend?
Me: (Blushes, giggles) I’m not your girlfriend and yes, your name is Sylar.
Sylar: But you are a girl and you are my friend so therefore, a girlfriend?
Me: Sure (giggles) let’s go and try to get your memory back
Sylar: Okay. (gets up)
(We walk by a guy selling pumpkin pie; Sylar has no reaction towards this)
Me: Wait! What did we just pass by?
Sylar: A pumpkin pie stand?
Me: (Dumbfounded) let’s keep going...
(We walk by a ton of fan girls, he does not run or fly away, and I continue my disbelief)
Me: Okay, this is seriously freaking me... (I trip on a tree branch and this makes me fall on Sylar, who also falls)
Sylar: (hits his head again) Ouch, my head hurts. Nicole, why are you on top of me?
Me: (Blushed, gets up) I’m sorry, I tripped and fell on you...WAIT. Did you just say my name?
Sylar: Yes...what’s the matter?
Me: WHAT’S YOUR NAME?
Sylar: Sylar...did I have amnesia or some... (sniffs the air) I SMELL PIE.
Me: -_-
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Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: (opens his front door) WHAT?!
Me: I’M SO BORED. Entertain me.
Sylar: Oh. Um, I was just going to the grocery store. Um, you want to come with me?
Me: Sure, it might entertain me. (trudging to his car because of my boredom)
(10 minutes later, we arrive at the grocery store. We enter the grocery store, we get many looks of fear)
Sylar: (Getting a basket, woman is in the way) Excuse me.
Woman: AHHHHH! (Runs and drops everything she was holding)
(We walk through the store, grabbing something in every aisle, still getting horrified stares and screams)
Man: HEY YOU! YOU HAVE NO RIGHT COMING IN HERE AND SCARING EVERYONE.
Sylar: (turns around) Excuse me? (Looks him dead straight in the eye)
Man: (goes wide eyed) UM NEVER MIND. (Turns around, screams and runs out the door)
Sylar: Let’s go pay!
(We walk up to a super long line)
Me: Sylar? Why this line?
Woman 2: (Looks at Sylar, goes wide eyed, she moves out of the line, the rest of the line follows until we’re next to pay)
Cashier: (Gulps, starts sweating) hel...hello. Did you find...find...everything you were...were looking for?
Sylar: (looks at him with the evil stare) No. Your prices are a bit too high
Cashier: (to the point of fainting) then...then...it’s (squeaks) free. (faints)
Sylar: (Takes his groceries) come on Nicole! (Grinning from ear to ear)
Me: (Looking for his car) wow, is it always like that when you buy groceries?
Sylar: Actually, no! I actually have no idea why they were that scared. Usually, I get a lot of staring. I NEVER get screams or free stuff.
Me: (looks at his face, goes wide eyed) uh...uh...THERE’S A SPIDER ON YOUR FACE! (points)
Sylar: (goes wide eyed) AHHHHHHHHHH!
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Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: WHAT!?
Spock: You need not yell. I must discuss something of rather importance with you.
Sylar: DUDE! I’M NOT TALKING WITH YOU. I DON’T LIKE YOU.
Spock: Take a number. But of course, what I must speak to you are about your misdemeanours against innocent victims.
Sylar: HAH! WHY DON’T YOU TAKE A NUMBER! You aren’t the first to try to change me!
Me: Hey guys! What’s going on?
Sylar: Mister Spock is trying to prevent me from killing people for their power.
Me: (looks at Spock) Really? Trust me, you aren’t the first to try to change him.
Spock: Why is everyone under the impression that this is a tough task to accomplish? Surely someone can change him.
Me: Nope! Sorry! You’d make the logical choice of not trying to change him.
Spock: Very well. (walks back to James T. Kirk)
Kirk: HAH! I TOLD YOU SO!
Spock: -_-
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Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar! Sylar!
Sylar: WHAT?! I’M ACTUALLY NOT BUSY SO YOU HAVE MY COMPLETE ATTENTION!
Me: I have a question that has been bothering me for quite a while actually.
Sylar: (goes wide eyed) it’s not one of those “do you like me” kind of questions is it?
Me: NO! Of course not! I was just wondering why you haven’t killed me or ran away from me since I’m like one of your biggest fans!
Sylar: (relieved) OH! It’s because unlike the fan girls...
Raine: AHHH! SYLAR! LET’S GET HIM GIRLS!
Me: (Sits waiting while Sylar gets chased by Raine, Jeslil, Atefeh, Tiff, and StephJP)
Sylar: (Comes back with his shirt missing and his hair messed up) you aren’t as ... fanatical as they are. And because you understand my need for ... (sniffs the air, gets up)
Me: (Sits waiting as Sylar gets lured in by the fan girls again)
Sylar: (comes back half naked with a plate of pumpkin pie) pie! Those are the reasons.
Me: I’m sorry, WHAT?! THAT’S WHY WE’RE FRIENDS?! BECAUSE I’M NOT FANATICAL AND I UNDERSTAND YOUR NEED FOR PIE?!
Sylar: (Looks shocked) umm...
Me: Yup, that seems right.
Sylar: -_-
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